Tuesday, May 31, 2005
define happy
happy : fortunate ; lucky ; feeling or expressing pleasure , contentment , satisfaction , etc.
well, just for the time being i guess. but i'm contented. although there are times when people in this house gets real irritating. but overall, i'm just glad that i'm back in canada.
for the past few days, i'm not been wasting my time. well, at least i feel accomplished. firstly, i did a little shopping and secondly i did a little of sight-seeing. sight-seeing that's what i called it. and i bought a new pair of sunglasses. i'm so happy. really loved it. oh yes. i can''t forget about that. bought lots and lots of lip gloss.
alright. about my so-called sight-seeing. my uncle drove us around of course. we went downtown. cause i'm living in uptown. haha. and that's not called countryside. okay. so we went downtown. really crowded, well, kind of. drove around the campus of university of toronto. that inspired me and i must get in. not matter what happens. haha. the place is really nice. so we walked around downtown today. really fun. and i'm starting to understand what is toronto like. haha. hmm. and downtown is nearly the same as orchard road. something like that. and i don't even know if my mom ever brings me to downtown. cause she have not been doing that for the past few years. and this time i'm there, is because she wants me to have an idea of how university of toronto looks like. so yeah. i really loved that place. i'm looking forward to seeing myself in there. just like how my uncle was talking about the days when he was there.
a few more days before my uncle's wedding reception. and i get to put makeup on of course. i'm looking forward to it. oh. and then some day we'll have a bbq. how fun and exciting.
oh great. in singapore time now, i'm like blogging early in the morning. and i can't be bothered to change the time i'm blogging from am to pm. so just ignore that.
and i want to watch madagascar. cause other movies were out long ago. and therefore i'm not able to watch it. that's how slow singapore is. i've got an example. monster-in-law came out on may 13 in canada. oh great.
alright. i shall stop here.
if not my ice cream is going to run away from me.
not forgetting my chocolates too.
au revoir!
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
8:20 PM
Friday, May 27, 2005
i'm very confused now.
and frustrated.
ahhhh.
i'm just not done with my packing.
i can practically shift my whole room over.
i'll never be done with my packing.
everything is in a mess now.
someone help.
but i'm excited though.
can't wait to board the plane.
but the long hours of flight scared me.
wonder how am i going to keep myself occupied.
alright.
better get back to my packing.
shall blog again when i'm in canada.
and to everyone.
I'M GOING TO MISS YOU ALL!
love you all!
hee.
au revoir!
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
10:30 AM
Thursday, May 26, 2005
carnival day.
it was fun though.
a day without lessons.
although i screwed up a little
in the performance given by us,
training team of string ensemble.
we managed to sell nearly all the things
and i didn't get to buy the pens elizabeth made.
got back report book too.
was obviously disappointed.
i couldn't even get straight As.
how am i supposed to aim for triple science?
got back my necklace too.
eventually i didn't want to see kong.
but i had to get, or must get back the necklace.
and in the end, it isn't that scary after all.
so she was just like talking and talking.
and i was like nodding and nodding.
yeah, so that was it. (:
alright. shan't blog much today.
should better get back to my packing.
if not i will have no more time.
very occupied tomorrow.
and i still love my hair.
it's simply too nice.
and claaar?
have i told you
that you're so nice,
sweet and such an angel.
you agreed to lend me your dolphin bay cd.
oh. i love you claaar. haha.
okayy. time for me to go.
and examine my beautiful hair.
au revoir
!One is happy as a result of one's own effort, once one knows the necessary ingredients of happiness - simple tastes, a certain degree of courage, self-denial to a point, love of work, and above all, a clear conscience. Happiness is no vague dream, of that i now feel certain.-George SandRealize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.-Og MandinoThe quickest way to acquire self-confidence is to do exactly what you are afraid to do.-Anon.[2 more days to Canada]i haven't pack my stuff yet! ahhh.
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
9:32 AM
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
i'm like so happy now. although i was terribly upset earlier on.
just had my hair rebonded and always cut and layered of course. and my mom was actually willing to spend 130 bucks. haha. and i love my hair! it's like so nice. but confirm there are people who will say i look weird or something. the first person to say that is my dear sister. but i still love my hair. hee.
got caught by judy kong for low socks. and i was hoping that she will not see my necklace. but lady luck had ran away. so in the end she confiscated it. and now i have to give reasons for why we have to wear school uniforms in order to redeem the necklace back. ahhh. but thanks to those who gave me lots and lots of valuable reasons. haha.
i'm feeling just so happy now. and i didn't practice my violin when we have to perform tomorrow. oh great. but who cares. now i have to worry on how i'm going to tie my hair. cause my fringe will fall and i still got to meet judy kong tomorrow. ahhh. haha
alright. i shall be off.
au revoir!
[3 more days to Canada]
i just realised i have been wishing for exactly what i wanted. and i'm glad my mom forced me to rebond my hair. (: and people who promised to send me off at the airport, you better turn up. haha. i'm serious.
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
8:30 AM
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
now i wished that there is someone whom i can pour everything out to. someone who will listen to me while i complain. wait patiently until i finish crying. sigh. just like the past. but that was the past. now i realised that suddenly everything and everyone had disappeared. i don't know who i could turn to when i need help. i don't know what i should do when i explode. and who knows what i will do to myself. seriously i need to let everything out. just like once when i was very stressed out and irritated by my mom. but i think this time it isn't that serious. or maybe i was able to tolerate everything better. i guess i'll just have to calm down. maybe i should get some tranquilizer. just in case i can't calm down at all and do some silly stuff.
sigh. i shall wait until that special someone who could share my troubles appear again. and sorry claaar. i know you give very good advice. but somehow i just can't pour everything out to you. (: but maybe i will. in future. cause you know i always pour all my troubles to someone else. so i guess i'm not used to it. sigh.
alright. i'm off.
and i can't be bothered to mug for math.
i'm going to be dead and i shall be.
au revoir!
i don't know if i'm wishing for the right things now. i think i have to go and rebond my hair tomorrow. sigh. hope i will not regret it. and of course. my mom was forcing me to rebond my hair. i guess she want me to look nice with straight hair at the wedding reception instead of messy hair. sighh.[4 more days to Canada]
disappointments.
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
8:51 AM
Sunday, May 22, 2005
yesterday was fun. lalala.
went for kcp homecoming and also kc family day. went at around 1 plus. such a pity i didn't go earlier. then walked around with claaar and charmaine. then my dear sister went into the haunted house 3 times. and it's not even scary. and i had 2 cups of ice cream. (:
then er. theresa and others were like running around trying to hug people. and claaar got half wet. i got a little wet. and sherrie too with that water gun. and tara didn't entertain me. hmm. dionis was er very excited when she saw me. lalala. then received this ceramic pendant from sherrie. she took the friends and i took the best. not fair. hee.
then went to charmaine house after that. watched 2 movies. and came my house for dinner. after dinner they went down to swim with their clothes on. i didn't want to get wet so didn't join them. and they tried splashing me. but i didn't get wet. hee.
alright. i'm off.
au revoir!
[6 more days to Canada]
i want people to send me off at the airport. i meant i want TARA and CLAAAR. haha. and kim too. haha.
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
12:29 AM
Friday, May 20, 2005
whee. i'm like so happy now. at least i'm feeling better than the past few days. and it was funny today. i came home and was supposed to go to the optical or get my ez-link card. but i told my mom that i can get it some other day. so yeah. pushed it to
some fine day. haha.
so i chose to go for movie with tara, claaar and kim. i was
nearly late. cause i took bus then half way through i got off and took a cab. then found claaar and tara. and realised that they were waiting for nathalie. so we waited and waited. haha. and missed a lot of the movie. and when we went in we had to walk pass so many people. i mean kim's friends. watched are we there yet. it was funny. and kim cried
four times. haha. so after the movie, we were like trying to decide where to go for dinner. then kim was like trying to get us to mix with her friends. it was all guys..and if my mom saw me there i would be killed. (: but i knew that she would be at home.
so anyway. we walked around cineleisure and then went to heeren. then we had chocolate milkshake at billy bombers. so nice. (: after which we
walked to plaza singapura. and tara started her little joke. she kept saying are we there yet. and practically everyone have been saying that when we reached plaza singapura. then first thing. me, tara and claaar went to the toilet. then went and decided to take out my contacts. i was exceeding the maximum time limit. haha. by a lot too. so took it out and claaar darling helped me open the contacts case. then after that went to eat cake and ice cream! i had my
banana. lalala. after we finished, walked around a little looking for new paper for my dear tara. haha. in the end it was sold out. then went home after going up and down the escalator. it wasn't on purpose.
hmm. the ride on the mrt was interesting. i was clinging onto claaar and then tara and a little of kim? haha. then so sad. had to get off so fast. whee. seeing claaar and tara again for kcp homecoming tomorrow. and kim better come and that's if tara talks to her mom. whee.
alright. i'm off.
got to wake up early tomorrow. so that my eye bags will be gone. (:
au revoir![8 more days to Canada]
claaar and tara PROMISED to send me off on 28th of May. and kim too. we are planning to have a very early breakfast!
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
9:53 AM
Thursday, May 19, 2005
i think i've been day-dreaming too much. i need to focus. on everything that is
important. i wonder what's wrong with me. the uneasy feeling is back again. sighh. and i've been thinking what will happen to my friends when i have to go back to canada for good. i also wondered how will i react when they come and visit me. hmm. i wonder why i'm thinking about all this.
i'm depressed again. and shilbe's letter today nearly made me cry. seriously. i don't know why. if i read it now i'll cry. but i couldn't at the time when i first read the letter. cause i was in school and we were like electing class committee. she was actually consoling me and asking me not to do silly stuff. but i don't know why i feel like crying. oh and shilbe! i can run away from home. your question was where will i stay. i've asked around. and many of my dear friends will welcome me to their home. (: and now my mom is complaining about my lost wallet
again. she has been complaining since tuesday. and the first time she scolded me i nearly cried too. actually tears has already filled my eyes. but being depressed also played a part in making me cry.
sigh. i don't know what to blog already. a lot of stuff cannot be typed down. and some cannot be put down in words. i can only feel it. maybe i should call someone and pour everything out. maybe i shall disturb claaar again. sighh.
oh well. no point thinking so much about it.
au revoir![9 more days to Canada]
i really want to cry. i can't hold my tears back anymore..
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
10:02 AM
Monday, May 16, 2005
why are people just so horrible. can't they be nice human beings. i guess not. well. guess what. there goes my wallet. it's stolen. i guess. it's either that or lost. but i'm pretty sure i didn't lose it. i don't mind losing the wallet. but i mind losing the things inside. i will die losing the stuff inside. just hope i can find it. even if the money are lost. i don't care. i want every other things back.
sigh. i can't take it anymore. i'm getting worried over so many things. i wondered how people actually thinks that i'm very cheerful. but i have no courage to cut myself. oh no. i actually am saying it on my blog. what if my mom or dad reads it. sigh. who cares. i seriously am losing all the courage i need. everything isn't going the right way and it's all not expected. sigh. i guess i shall heed claaar's advice and pray. and really..pray hard.
in serious bad mood now
au revoir!
[12 more days to Canada]
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
11:02 AM
Saturday, May 14, 2005
i'm finally getting my contacts. (:
received the call yesterday afternoon. right after i was complaining non-stop. lalala. so happy and excited now. going to get it later. and soon i'll be scared of the contacts again..haha
oh no. i just remembered that i still have lots of things to complete before tomorrow. i'm just so dead. and and and charmaine and her whole family are coming for dinner tonight. then the more i must finish rushing everything by evening. ahhh.
alright. i'm off.
au revoir!
[13 more days to Canada]
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
11:07 PM
this is irritating. grrr.
i still haven't get my contacts. it's supposed to be friday. and now. it's like don't know when? it's not ready and now i have to wait until thoe people call and ask me to go and get it. ahhh. so much for my excitement.
i'm dying. i still haven't practise my piano and violin. and i'm here. how nice.
ahh. forget it. i have nooo mood to blog.
alright. au revoir!
[14 more days to Canada]
i'll die before the day comes..
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
3:35 AM
Thursday, May 12, 2005
i'm suddenly sick of ice cream. oh great. i still have 1 and a half tub of ice cream left. i'm practically wasting money.
my mom sewing my BELT now. (: so nice of her. then i won't get caught! stupid TAN JIA LING. anyhow play with my poor belt. and there! it came off. i mean it was ripped off. and and and i want to get new uniforms already. hee.
so happy. string audition is postponed to next wednesday. and i hope ms sim will be sick this coming monday. then mep practical can be postponed too. (: but still. i haven't practiced for both. actually i did. a little bit. lalala
i'm getting my contacts TOMORROW! yay! so happy. but so not fair. sherrie got her laptop faster than me getting my contacts. NOT FAIR. even though i bought mine first. so she was happier than me first. not fair not fair not fair. lala. hee. oh. and i'm so going to bang down her door.
ahhh. no mood to blog already. got sooo many things to worry about. ahhh.
alright. time for me to sit down and think HARD.
au revoir!
[16 more days to Canada]
doughnuts! big yummy sweet ones!
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
6:27 AM
Monday, May 09, 2005
whee. the whole tub of ice cream is sitting in front of me again. and my mom just refused to believe that i can finish the whole thing. anyway haagen daz normal tub of ice cream is very little. not like those big big ones. haha.
hmm. now i dream of baskin robbin(think this is the correct spelling) ice cream in Canada. ohh! and the donuts! the very sweet ones and the not really sweet ones. oh my goodness. they're like from heaven. i really miss the donuts! although my uncles or is it grandma always complained that it is tooo sweet. but it's JUST SO NICE.
oh no. now claaar is not online. and i'm just too lazy to sms her. i've got to ask her something! ahh. haha. actually it's not exactly important..
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
9:32 AM
hmm. happiness!
just finished my ice cream. was eating from the tub itself. but only managed to eat 1/4 of it because i don't want to finish it straight away? haagen daz ice cream. whee. so nice. but i think my brother's tub of ice cream nicer. don't know what flavour. but who cares. i have 2 tubs of different flavours to myself. whee.
can't wait to get my contacts. but i won't dare to wear it. haha. and thanks claaar for your ENOURAGEMENT and also her discouragement. haha.
AUDITION. wednesday. terrifying! in front of sec 4. oh my goodness. i can walk in and faint. oh haha. right. i'm just so rubbish. anyway got to learn my scales. if not i die. and there'll be sight reading too. ahh. oh. and claire was teaching me vibrato during mep! (: and she promised to help me and tutor me before the audition. hee.
OH. and mep practical. eventually my slot is on next monday, the SECOND person. and there will be AUDIENCE. which will be the class only but still! die die die. i'm so looking forward to monday. NOT.
better start practicing. sigh.
alright. au revoir!
[19 more days to Canada]
looking forward to Canada and of course my contact lenses! (:
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
5:59 AM
Friday, May 06, 2005
miracles? guess not. guess my hard work has been paid off. i'm been 'begging' my darling mommy for forever. and finally! there i have it. (:
my contact lenses! bought it today. but will only get it on next friday. bought the permanent ones. and i had to try out the contacts. not the actual one but a trial one. and it was just so terrible. kept tearing non-stop. my poor eyes. haha. and it was uncomfortable. and and and it's painful. actually it's not. haha. i don't know what's wrong with me. but overall, uncomfortable. could feel the contacts moving when i blink. can't even look straight. poor me. haha.
and guess what. my mom wants me to go for rebonding. she wants me to be either A tester or HER tester. she asked me to try rebonding my hair and see what's the result. and most probably if that salon is of any good. ahh. no way am i going to be her tester. even though i really want my hair rebonded badly. but i don't care anymore.
oh. now i have very important things to worry about. string's audition for performing team is next wednesday. how nice. short and sweet notice. and now, i've got to practice my piano for MEP practical and violin for the audition. stress! once again. and don't forget. history test on monday. i'm just so dead.
i just realised that next week will be the 8th week. and in 3 weeks time..Canada here i come! whee. but but but..thinking of the 3 weeks before going to Canada will be torturing. i'll be bombarded with tests and CAs and so on. ahhh.
shall start on my history now. since i practiced piano a little just now. and i shall practice violin tomorrow morning. anyone willing to give me morning call? haha.
alright. au revoir!
[22 more days to Canada]
hmm. wedding. make-ups. gowns. photos. shopping. bowling. visiting. bbq. the list goes on and on.
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
10:25 AM
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
i really want to rebond my hair!
but even me myself said that i shouldn't. sigh. i shall just wait and wait and wait.
i also want my contact lenses!
i'm having just too much wants. mom is having second thoughts now. i think. oh no..
and i'm here worrying about all this stuff when everybody out there is worrying about their mid years. how nice. (:
oh yes. i still want my pink eyeliner. someday i'll get it. i'll just drag some people, definitely not my mom or my sister, and they're help me choose. *evil grin* they better watch out..
li qin still haven't lend me her moulin rouge cd. although i just found out yesterday. or was it the day before. but i really really want to watch. hee.
and and and i think i'm going to get just sooo freaked out in school for the next two days. they are getting more and more insects. eeee. there's this huge frog today and mealworms and lots of beetles. eeeee. and they put the frog, which is of course in a container, ON MY TABLE. if they don't get it away by TOMORROW, i'm just going to throw out of class. eee. my poor table..
finally birthday wishes!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY to
SHERRIE and
MY DARLING FRIEND IN HONG KONG.and oh great. i haven't gotten their presents yet. and i'm yet to call my darling friend in hong kong and wish her happy birthday. i got to call her soon though.
and i still owe shilbe's birthday present. jialing's half birthday present. and er. anymore? so far..don't think so. ahhh. stress. hee.
i feel like killing my ever so dumb sister. she doesn't remember the good old WOODEN CAR. haha. what's with me and the wooden car. hmm. i'm not sure. haha. i just love the wooden car. if it's removed from the playground when i get back to canada, i'll bound to kill those people who removed it.
hmm. i'm supposed to study history but so far i haven't done it? at least i've done my math. alright. so history and my phone call. they're waiting for me.
au revoir!
[24 more days to Canada]
am i dreaming? i can land on my dear homeland soon. i sound so dramatic..
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
7:29 AM
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
i'm having second thoughts.
many people said that i shouldn't rebond my hair. maybe i shouldn't after all. leave it the way it is and be natural. (: then should i wear contact lenses? i have huge eye bags and always gets panda eye. sighh..i'm confused.
ohh! and i just found out that dodo club was opened by shilbe's mother friend. how nice. haha. and they sell pink eyeliners. (:
today's science paper, according to many people, was very hard. to me? no comments. haha. i have a feeling i'm going to lose a lot of marks. and there's still many projects to rush. by this week!
and i want li qin's moulin rouge cd! i don't care! she MUST lend me. haha.
i just realised that i owe many people presents. hmm. i'm just so dead. i'll be sooo broke. and of course i have to get nearly all of them in canada. sighh.
oh yeah. violin tuition was CANCELLED today! haha. i'm just so happy. and i can finally quit. yay! no more staying back for me on tuesday. was at starbucks with claaar just now. helped her with her math AGAIN. and in the end, i didn't do any of my homeworks..i'm just so nice. i'm always helping claaar. AND i was having gastric just now. plus if my mom finds out, i'll be dead instantly. so i was taking a lot of risks..haha. i could faint from my gastric pain, i think. haha. if it gets THAT serious.
alright. shall stop here. irritating people are disturbing me.
au revoir!
[25 more days to Canada]
i really really miss the playground's wooden car in canada..
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
6:35 AM
Monday, May 02, 2005
i didn't know that science can actually kill. well, it haven't really killed me yet but half. so that means i'm already half dead. oh no. i'm talking rubbish. what have science done to ME???
my darling mother has finally agreed on getting me contact lenses. but when? i don't know. it may take forever. but i'm pretty sure she'll get it for me before canada. now. i still have to persuade her to let me rebond my hair. whee. and claaar was like saying, "i wonder who hated her mom yesterday". she said it on sunday. so that means saturday i was very irritated by my dear mother. because of some reasons.
i saw some nice nice pink eyeliner the other time at tampines. haha. I WANT! i shall wait.
and i still have to get birthday presents for sherrie and my darling friend in hong kong. apparently their birthdays fall on the same day. how nice. and apparently i don't know why they have a little similarities. their phone numbers nearly have the same numbers but in different orders. oh. and each by 1 number different only. wow..haha. and i'm sooo going to be broke.
alright. i need to get back to my science. if not my pink coffin will be waiting for me. though i agree with claaar that it'll not be a pretty sight. haha.
au revoir!
[26 more days to Canada]
many many obstacles to overcome before i could go to my darling canada..
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
10:41 AM
Sunday, May 01, 2005
what is it that i actually wants?
what exactly is it that makes me feel so depressed?
and sad?
i'm confused.
i'm having this very uneasy feeling.
and i don't know the cause of it.
maybe i need to see a psychologist.
how can i be happy?
how can i overcome this?
how? how? how?
i'm very very confused now.
i hate this feeling.
someone help.
forget it.
no point thinking about it.
i'll just have to live with it.
until it's gone.
hmm. let's see. oh. there are happy things though. i just realised that the wedding reception is such a grand thing. some people will be coming to help us put on make up! and do up our hair! then we'll go somewhere and take photos! yay! i'm just so excited. can i ask for pink eyeliner? haha. hope i can still see my cousin though.
i miss the wooden car in the playground that i grew up with..in canada. i mean when i was very very young, i would go there every evening? and sit there. whenever i see the wooden car now, i would have this feeling. of i don't know what. it's as if i've known it for all my life. just that it's not a living thing. haha. but i have always love the wooden car.
alright. i've got to get back to my science. if i don't do well for the next CA, i'll be dead. and there goes my ambition. i have to work hard! (: au revoir!
oh yeah. thanks claaar for your very logical advice yesterday! really appreciate it. thanks! and we shall work hard and do well for our exams okay? i shall not think of any other things now. haha. (:
[27 more days to Canada]
do i really belong there? i've always feel as though i'm home when i'm there. and all my good old memories..my wooden car too of course! i shall take a photo of it if it's still there in june..
vicki the SEXY sunshine loves you!
5:25 AM